Eulogy for Andy Scheer

June 19, 2009
Composed by his family and delivered by his son Tom

I am accustomed to speaking in front of groups but this is a very different situation. The emotions we have been through over the past few months and past few days has been an amazing roller coaster. Surprise, disbelief, hope, exhaustion, laughs, love. But one of the most unexpected emotions is appreciation. We’ve been given the opportunity to look back at Dad’s life and begin to see the patterns of what made him who he was. It can be summed up in one word, “giving.” 

I hope all of you here had the pleasure of seeing my Dad in action. He was always the first to volunteer, to help or take on a task. I don’t think the word “no” was in vocabulary. He gave of himself unselfishly. I firmly believe that his actions were driven by pure goodness and not by a need to draw attention to himself. Dad would have rather stayed in the kitchen or behind the scenes or everyone’s favorite – behind the grill. 

Dad was all about family. Of course his immediate family, Mom, me, Patricia, Andrew and Mathew, Mike, Leah, Amanda and Kelly, all the Connecticut Scheers, the Long Island Scheers, the Florida Scheers, the Pollocks, the Tullys. 

He was also about extended family, the other kids and grandkids that he helped raise and shape into the people they are today: Craig, Rob, Willy, Joe Carey, Tom Murphy, Peter, Steven, James, Danielle, the Lizard, Dylan, Justin and Damon and Dylan and Casey. 

And the friends who are family: Barb and Bob, Mary-Lou and Doug, Barb and Ray, Dr. Allen and the Coffinio’s, Dennis and Virginia, Brian and Grace, Pat and Frank Murphy, the Hunters, the Larizzas,  and a thousand other people that I know I have forgotten – here’s where that apology thing fits in. The problem with even attempting such a list with Dad is that he touched everybody – I mean every single person – in such a special way.

Dad also had other families – the fire house, the town and the church. If you look at anyone who has ever been involved in Chappaqua the community for the past 80 years, you’d be hard pressed to find anybody who has given as much to this town as Andy Scheer. In fact, if you just say the name Andy in the town of Chappaqua, everyone knows who you are talking about. 

Dad was born in a house one street down the hill on Orchard Ridge Road – literally born at the house. Back in 1927 there was no Mt. Kisco Hospital, no Northern Westchester. Dad was the baby of the family, the little brother to Johnny, George, and Mary.  I know Dad is in good company now with Johnny and Honey, George and Aud, Mary and Chick. Believe it or not, Dad was born a mere five years after the little church was built, and for the past 60+ years if you went to 7:30 mass, Andy would find you a seat and give you a hard time. 

Dad was in one of the first graduating classes from Horace Greeley High School, which we now know as the Robert E. Bell Middle School.  Actually Mr. Bell was Dad’s principal. Dad was a Marine, or should I say is a Marine. I think this is where he learned the phrase “rub it in the dirt,” which he passed on to Mike and I, and we in turn are passing it on to our kids.

     

Fifty some years ago, Dad met the love of his life and companion for the next 60 years, Mimi, Dee, Dolores, mom. 

After working in the city for a few years he rather quickly figured out that the commuting life was not for him. He took a job working for the Town of New Castle where he spent the rest of his working career helping this town. 

Dad’s decision to give up the fast track in the city at a major corporation is one for which we will be forever grateful. At the time it was really lousy being a kid with Andy Scheer as a dad. With all his friends in town, we had thousands of people (including the local cops) watching our every move. Mike and I learned discretion at a very early age.

So to finish this up, so I’ll list out some of the random things that have come to us in the past few days:

    Oreos

    The Mets – how could you talk about Dad and not mention the Mets

    His cooking, his gravy – “let me just heat that up for you”

    Swing/big band

    It’s only takes 10 minutes

    Family picnics in the backyard

    Camping trips with the Murphy’s to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, Cape Cod, Pennsylvania Dutch country

        Camping with the Connecticut Scheers at Hamonassit

        Christmas at the Larizza’s or the Amodio’s

        Aunt Louise cooking bachala

The fire house picnics, Mets games and everyone’s favorite, Santa Claus. Yes, our Dad really was Santa Claus.

I hope we are up to the challenge of keeping the Dad’s legacy alive. Amanda danda, Keller, Andrew, Matthew, it’s all about giving, caring and selflessness. 

You are loved and will be missed, Dad.